Have you ever had that overwhelming feeling that you’re not being your best, whether at work, as a wife, friend or mother?
That’s such a common stick that as women we use to beat ourselves. Expecting to achieve high standards in every area of our lives, all at the same time.
Logically we know that no one can be superwoman, but why do others seem to be better at it than us?
The solution, we’re told is getting a good ‘work-life balance’ But does such a thing actually exist?
I like to think of it more as making work and life choices.
These choices can vary from one month or day to the next. You may choose, on a week when you’ve got an important project at work, to prioritise work. But the next week to give more time and energy to your family or yourself.
We need to accept that it’s okay to prioritise our lifestyle or our work at different times and that achieving ‘good enough’ really is enough.
If you’re struggling to make choices then here are a few tips:
Put boundaries in place – whichever area of your life it is, decide what the boundaries are that you won’t allow yourself or others to step over. This could be not reading work emails at weekends, saying no to going out with friends to avoid upsetting them or putting an hour of ‘me time’ in a couple of times a week
You don’t have to be a martyr – Do you ever hear yourself thinking ” I have to do everything around here” or “I might as well just do it, I’ll do it quicker or better”. Then you’re falling into the I’m indispensable trap. Let others support you and trying asking for help.
Change ‘I should” to “I could” – do you really have to work extra hours to get your report perfect rather than 80%? Would it be a disaster if the family had a microwaved meal rather than a home cooked meal? Challenge your rules on what you ‘should’ do
Don’t engage in worrying – getting caught up in a worry spiral takes up on average two and a quarter hours a day. Just think what else you could do with that time!
Speak up – if your workload is too much, take responsibility for speaking up to your boss. If you need more help at home, discuss it with your family
Recognise when you’re struggling – it’s important for your wellbeing that you don’t push yourself, as it can have a negative effect on your mental health. Exercise, socialising and hobbies, have been proven to help with stress
By focusing on these tips you will be able to make make the right work/life choices for you.