You may have been trying for years to change a bad habit, it could be drinking too much, eating too much chocolate or not exercising enough. If it’s still a problem then you obviously haven’t succeeded yet, so could your identity be the issue?
Your identity is the image you have of who you are and of what others think of you. It varies at different times and in different areas of your life and can be helpful in giving you purpose or can hold you back from making changes.
A client I worked with who was trying to reduce their drinking was blocked by an identity that clashed with the new habit she desired. She described herself as “not an alcoholic but I drink everyday and heavily at weekends”, she also said “I am the kind of social person who others see as fun, lively and says yes to everything”. If this was her identity how was she going to cut back on drinking?
Another instance where a rethink of identity would help in changing a bad habit, is the person who says they’re a workaholic and wants to reduce their working hours. Also the larger person who says they’re the jolly, fun one everyone jokes with and isn’t intimidated by. What might be preventing them from losing weight?
So, if you find it hard to change a habit, and keep trying and failing, it maybe an issue of identity is involved.
Your first step should be to identify how you would describe your current identity or how you think others would. Next think about how it would need to change for you to adopt a new habit.
It’s up to you then to decide if the pay off is worth it!
For more information on Confidence Coaching, please contact me